An evolution of a Realization.

THE thought bubbled up when I was sitting on the third floor's toilet, where no one usually came and I could take time to ponder. I rolled The thought in my mind inattentively; it was a legitimate idea, I supposed, yet somewhat presumptuous and blown out of proportion. It belonged to the realm of the aimless, unconfirmable thoughts that came during toilet breaks and went away as fast as the flushing water. I gave myself a squeeze to conclude and forgot to wash my hands as I rushed back to class.

But the body sometimes betrays the dictatorial mind to rescue itself. The moment I sat down, my mouth blurted out to the person in the next seat like a victim that mouthed for help when the perpetrator glanced away. I think I had social anxiety disorder, I said. A verbal confirmation of The thought was all it took for the reservoir of emotions to break free the dam of conscious defense. My body authorized her own experience and tears welled up. She wept for the next some hours until her spiritual pores were cleansed. Past experiences and knowledge clicked and united to produce a realization that reshaped my person's narrated history.

Having the language to call one's conditions brings tremendous clarity and relief. I hope that we permit ourselves the courage and kindness to not doubt our realizations.