Why I blog.

Hi dear one, today's blog post is more like an intimate update letter. I want to document my creative journey as a way to reflect and encourage myself while having my friends walking alongside spiritually.

{So} I am creating again! (^≗ω≗^)

I have been writing this blog consistently every day, mostly by waking up around 4.30 am to ruminate my mind for an hour or two. Although this satisfies me deeply, I don't want to romanticize myself by creating the impression of effortless action.

The hardest challenge for me has been deciding on a topic and direction that I will commit to. I would go down a rabbit hole of consuming Youtube and articles in the name of "research" quite often. In long stretches of indecision, usually I dozed off to sleep, woke up to pee, felt hungry (again) and made food, then finally circled back to reading more articles for "research" purposes.

This means that each day, I get to practice decisiveness. This trait has been one of my favorite self-development lessons throughout my young adult life. Growing up, being denied the right to have "inappropriate" feelings while seeing the sacrifice of my needs and desires as a virtue of care, I became severely detached from my feelings; thus, sometimes it could take me months to realize whether I had or hadn't liked something. Practicing decisiveness requires me to reach out to my once forbidden feelings and make love with myself so deeply that I can re-open the portal of spontaneity and instant emotional feedbacks.

When I show up to write a blog post each morning, I am healing my emotional baggages. This applies to all commitments I make, whether it is creating, using loving speech, eating well, being active physically and what not.

Now I turn the mirror to you: What commitment are you making and what emotional baggages does that commitment help you heal?